I think, I’ve just solved the mystery which tormented me for several days. And when I puzzled out what the actions of the book’s characters were based upon, I realized that I’m prone to act in the same erroneous way too.
It isn’t a secret that the world around us imperfect. However, we have to live in it, whichever it was. For some people the world’s flaws are enough to think up their propre universe to live in. But is this imaginary world better than real one? Often it contains nothing but personal injuries, failures, missed opportunities and castles in the air. People, which chose to live in a dreamy world, may be penetrating and blind simultaneously. They can clearly see all the vices of the reality. They perfectly recognize the dark looming a long way off, but their eyes are insensible to any light close by. They feel the chasm they’re rushing to, but didn’t notice the arms outstretched towards them. The longer they remain blind, the farther the arms are. In the end they bury themselves in the abyss of solitude where there is no return from.
I guess, I pay too much attention to the past. Neither can I cease to surrender myself to the beautiful moments of my life, nor can I consign to oblivion personal offences. My mind is always trying to take me back instead of focusing on the present and the future. The kind of blindness I mentioned above. But the past isn’t alterable; the future is.
In addition, I discerned another fault of mine, which distorts the world around. A feeling akin to greediness. If I receive something from the world, I always want to receive it more and more. And when it happens that the source can’t satisfy my voracity, I simply reject it at all. It’s stupid. I should be more moderate and reasonable.
I wish I’d became aware of these things earlier. But, they say, better late than never.
Many people are likely to have similar demerits. I’ll be happy if someone cast a look on the note and see themselves through the lines. If someone doesn’t agree with me, I’ll be happy too. Just let me know where I’m wrong.